We have bees living and working in our Chiku tree. They are making a honey comb and have been busy for the last five days. At first we thought that we were just a pit stop on route to a new hive because bees don't usually like to build their honey making establishments in such an open spot. But since they have been working away for five days now, we are assuming that they are producing SOMETHING. They are very relaxed bees and allow me to stand 2 feet away from their business without so much as a buzz. They occasionally ripple their wings across the hive and it is fun to watch them. Oh. And they are very small.

I just finished a Waldorf Arts camp with a great big bundle of joyous kids.
I hope to see these gorgeous and sweet ones soon. Tho' one of these angels is moving back to Korea I plan to gather them up again soon to play some more.

We painted almost every day. Worked with clay, felted with wool twice, made our own personal deck of "Go fish" cards, spilt lots of glue, splashed soapy water and put on orange peel "perfume".

One of our cats, Missy, is no longer eating or moving from her spot on the marble living room floor. She doesn't seem to be in a lot of pain but is not able to walk much. She is very old (19.5) and we do not want to take her to the vet for "tests". I don't care if this seems cruel to anyone. I believe that it is cruel to force the elderly into institutions and then expect them to thrive. Missy is drinking ice water (she won't drink it unless it has ice in it) and sitting up when I pet her (every few hours). She is, however, walking into Mary Beth's bathroom and urinating on the floor at night. This is her best effort.

Missy is a wonderful old girl. She is still purring when I spend time with her and seemed to enjoy the children's attentions when they arrived for and departed from camp.

Actually, I like preparing for the children to come. I guess I am a bit of a dork that way. Lining everything up. Putting things in baskets or writing children's names on water colored labels. I like to imagine that when I am telling the story it comes out like magic. And then the day comes and we are sometimes too busy doing it to remember how much is here. So much to work with!

Instead of freaking out over night before camp jitters I am eating these. There isn't a recipe because you don't need one.
Just unsweetened cocoa, dates, nuts of your choice and dried fruit if you like. I put almonds, walnuts, dried blueberries and cranberries in these and rolled some in sesame seeds. That's right. No sugar. But keep them in the freezer. They taste best cold.

It has been raining buckets today and there has been a lot of flooding on Orchard Street (the high end part of town) but I don't mind the rain at all. I can give the AC a break.

Yesterday the twins came for their math practice and we had lots of fun talking about number qualities, learning about "abundant numbers" and making free-hand geometric drawings (above).

The dates aren't definite but these are the talks I am proposing starting in the fall:

Why do children like to "doodle" and how can we make doodling into a practice that helps create inner and outer balance? Come to practice Form Drawing with a Waldorf Certified teacher and learn how to turn those free moments into opportunities to balance the life forces. We will practice form drawings for people of all ages so come with your colored pencils and explore at 3pm August 21 at WSEAS! (Note* form drawing is done without aid of any instruments.)


From the cover of "Formdrawing" by Laura Embrey-Stine and Ernst Schuberth

Are you always first in line and do you become impatient with people who are "slow"?
Do you have many interests and many friends but sometimes find yourself forgetting your appointments?
Are you most interested in good conversation and a delicious meal?
Do your friends like to share their troubles with you?
Find out what this might mean in our "personality types" study of The Four Temperaments on September 18 at 3pm (at WSEAS).

If you have young children at home it can sometimes become exhausting trying to find appropriate activities. Build a healthy foundation for development by playing Games for Developing the lower senses. Discover how Saturday, October 16 at 3pm.

"Home is where the heart is," or so they say. But lately home has become the place where our "stuff" is. And this "stuff" can sometimes keep us from what we really want, that is, connection with our family and friends in a nurturing atmosphere. What can you do to bring simplicity and encourage participation in your home and family life? Please attend this talk, Simplicity in the Home to answer this question, on Saturday, November 20 at 3pm.

This is a very BASIC round but so lovely.
I am gathering my resources for camp and hope to use this one.
For this Waldorf Craft Camp starting at our home here on Monday I have the following fun activities planned:

Games with a rope that involve shaping the rope cooperatively and jumping over it,
"Jack be nimble..."
Singing and clapping songs.
Form drawing (read drawing celtic knots) starting with spirals.
Clay with pressed leaves.
Wet on wet watercolor painting.

Bean bag games.
Wool felting colored balls with ribbons which turns them into cool comets.
And a story.

Seeing as how we are doing camp here instead of at school I pray that the Booty girl doesn't get too bent about me being here but not available. I guess it will be as it needs.

We have guests staying on Friday and Saturday night (Jake and Bella Tan) who are doing a Waldorf intro talk. I hope Jake and Bella can bring some light onto the subject as we have so many "talks" and so little actual Waldorf living here. It is a question that lives inside me. Marinating. Well, actually right now I believe it is simmering.

While searching for the perfect fairy tales for our Waldorf Craft campers I discovered the Enchanted Snake from the Green Fairy tale book which starts out:

Once upon a time...
There was once upon a time a poor woman who would have given all she possessed for a child, but she hadn't one.

Now it happened one day that her husband went to the wood to collect brushwood, and when he had brought it home, he discovered a pretty little snake among the twigs.

When Sabatella, for that was the name of the peasant's wife, saw the little beast, she sighed deeply and said, 'Even the snakes have their brood; I alone am unfortunate and have no children.' No sooner had she said these words than, to her intense surprise, the little snake looked up into her face and spoke: 'Since you have no children, be a mother to me instead, and I promise you will never repent it, for I will love you as if I were your own son.'

This made me laugh...

Lately I have come to a realization about why communication can be so difficult.
Not many really want to connect. We have all the tools in the world for "reaching out" but we prefer to sit on our computers and email at a distance. I found myself doing this today. Meeting with parents here to discuss education and to share ideas has become such a challenge because for the most part parents want one thing for themselves and another for their children. I nearly eviscerated myself trying to explain to one mom about how when a group reaches for a goal, it is necessary for everyone in the group to leave their personal desires at the door and focus on the goal, (I was not being subtle I know). I realized the best analogy would be the Goethean conversation but then she accused me of being high and mighty or not transparent enough and could I write it down in a letter for her? Maybe the following essay will help.


“Whence came you hither?” asked the golden king.
“Out of the clefts where the gold dwells,” replied the serpent.
“What is more glorious than gold?”
“Light.”
“What is more quickening than light?”
“Conversation.” From Goethe's Green Snake and the Beautiful Lily

Unless one understands what Goethe meant, one can feel disappointed at the serpent’s answer, which scarcely seems the revelation one expected. For is conversation as we know it in the Twenty First Century really more glorious than gold, more quickening than light? Hardly! We attach the term to every casual exchange, to the most idle, inconsequential chit-chat. Surely, we feel, the term must have come down in the world since Goethe’s day, suffering the severest diminution in its slide.

That this is indeed the case becomes apparent when we recall the salons of earlier centuries where great minds came together for significant talk. These occasions were of a wholly different order from our social happenings. They were disciplined, where ours are chaotic. They were built around a common purpose, mutually enriching rather than depleting. It is impossible to picture the participants in a salon all talking at once, babbling away on as many subjects as there were pairs of conversationalists present. No! Rather, the star of a theme hung over the assemblage as over a pool studded with crystals, and the responsively scintillating crystal intellects took turns voicing the reflections awakened in them.

Goethean conversations differ at least as much again from those of the salon as did the salon from today’s cocktail party. Their purpose is to call forth a fullness of spiritual life, not to stage displays of intellectual fireworks. They have nothing in common with the salon’s formal play of light points sparkling in cold starlit glitter. Instead, they strive to enter the sunward realm of living thoughts where a thinker uses all of himself as a tool of knowledge, where, in the manner of his thinking, he takes part as a creative spirit in the ongoing process of the cosmos.
For more click on
The Art of Goethean Conversation
Marjorie Spock

Red Tent Project:

Hello crafters!
I have just been alerted by my friend over at Solohandmade about a wonderful work in progress to provide much needed supplies to women in Ethiopia. Find details below and let me know if you are interested in helping out. I am putting this out because I don't think it is ANYTHING to be ashamed about but something natural and worthy of attention and HELP.

Written by a mom who also adopted from Ethiopia:

Our agency felt burdened by the young girls’ overwhelming need for sanitary pads in Ethiopia. I don’t think I need to explain what a HUGE problem this is. Many girls are considered “unclean” for a week each month and are unable to go to school or work. Here are some facts:

Ordinary woman are unable to afford basic sanitary protection.
One pack of sanitary pads costs more than 50% of the average monthly wage for women.

Millions of African women are forced to replace tampons/pads with newspapers and dirty rags.

This can lead to infections for which there may not be available medication. These infections are often mistaken to be STDs leading to social embarrassment and in some cases, domestic violence.

Wives and mothers are unable to work when they have their periods, further hindering already impoverished families.

Girls are forced to take time off school, further jeopardizing their education.

Because of the economic and cultural crises in Ethiopia, its schools serve as more than academic centers. They provide community resources where young people receive basic care and services, such as food programs, clean water and counseling.


We are currently working on a project to provide the girls at our agency’s transition home with reusable menstrual pads. We are starting with the older girls first. There are about 30 girls who need the pads and we’d like to send 3 of the outer envelopes and 6 of the inner pads to each girl – so we’ll need 90 envelopes and almost 200 pads!

Here is where I need your help…I don’t know a thing about sewing, but I am very passionate about this cause. I am calling all my friends (adoption-related or not) to consider helping these young women have a safe way to protect themselves each month.

If you are interested, I will send you the pattern and a photo of the pads. I have been told that they are fairly simple to make.

We had several meltdowns today. But they were good ones. That is, an indication of how tired the girl really was.
Typically, whenever we leave a friends house or when friends leave ours, Booty says, "Ohhhh, I am so sad! I miss my friends!" Well today after we left Nikki and Loewen Gardens ( w/singing duo Mark and Ruben and the trampoline) she said, " Next time I want to stay with my friends FOREVER!" and she meant it. She really gets a lot from being with other children. In fact, I encourage her being with "naughty" children too. She doesn't actually care if the children can't share or they go on and on about the "stuff" they have. She likes everyone. And luckily, most of her friends are peaceful sorts. Henry is the picture of peace. The guy runs around his house primavera and everyone is great with it. Booty doesn't even notice. I think Booty expresses my feelings exactly. Life is so rich because of our friends!!!

D and her daughters met us at Jacob Ballas yesterday and it was hot but a very nice time for all. We had scheduled it for the day before but I had to switch at the last minute because of a forgotten engagement with my superstar Dr.Lakshmi. Lucky for us it was a good move. On Wednesday it rained so hard for two hours in the morning that there was severe flooding in the Orchard Road area. It looked like India! So instead we had a hot but relatively dry afternoon marveling at dragonflies, trees, vines of fruiting plants and unsupervised children throwing rocks.

As usual, the company was superb. I couldn't have chosen a more amiable and peaceful group. And Booty loves the girls so! If I am lucky I will be teaching them one day a week in the fall.

I just withdrew my proposal for the extended day program at the school. With the admin. responsibilities and a whole mess of other "new" pursuits I really don't have the energy to renegotiate a program (the board came back with issues )that was going to be a real stretch for me as it is. I guess part of my problem is I want to teach so badly that I am compromising myself and I know it. But I am sad too. As I feel there is something happening in this community that keeps it from saying "YES!"

Trying to navigate the bureaucracy of Singapore's MOM (Ministry of Manpower) has been quite maddening. I have spent hours just trying to cancel a work permit to no avail.

And now we are trying to get a PIO card for me and a COI card for Booty. Lots of paperwork which we retained from our last effort thank goodness.

And a big

THANK YOU to Dr. Lakshmi who is staying here and doing wonderful work with every person who walks through the door.
We are so lucky to have her here. She saw the H this morning and he walked downstairs with a big smile on his face and I know there was a good session that took place between them. What blessings!!!

This week we had some new friends over for a lovely, relaxed afternoon. The back of Davina is shown here as she watches Booty who is "waiting for a bag-ride". Her daughters Sophia and Olivia painstakingly sculpt many bread dough figures in between playing with the little energy girl. Davina's girls have been home-schooled for the past two years and their ability to work with what they have is quite impressive. I have never met such independent and content spirits. But also it must be noted that their mum is someone I would describe as angelic, in the classic sense. Light seems to surround her.



I continue to marvel at the book, Secret History of the World by Jonathan Black published by Quercus in 2008. Below are some brief passages.

After a mention of ancient man's view of 'biorhythms" (the relationship between the earth and the moon, sun and seasons) he proceeds-
"But beyond these more obvious rhythms, the ancients recognized how other, more mathematically complex rhythms that involve the outer reaches of the cosmos work their way into human life. Humans breathe on average 25,920 times per day, which is the number of years in a great Platonic year ( i.e. the number of years it takes for the sun to complete a full cycle of the zodiac). The average or 'ideal' human life, seventy two years also has the same number of days in it."

Also deeply affecting:
"We saw earlier that gods, angels and spirits were believed to be emanations from the great cosmic mind- Thought Beings in other words. What I am asking you to consider now is that these great Thought-Beings expressed themselves through people. If today we naturally think of people thinking, in ancient times they thought of Thoughts peopling."

Thoughts peopling.

A good remedy for birthday anxiety is a long and strenuous walk. We took one to Clark Quay, which is a bit commercial especially with the canal tour. But Booty enjoyed the walk and boat ride and frankly, we were just glad to get out of the house.

Beeswax fruit anyone?

I know it may seem weird after all the regular ranting and raving that happens here in this blog but let me just say,
I LOVE MY MACBOOK PRO.
I mean, (to steal from Woody Allen) I don't just love it, I lowwwb it, I Laaaaave it!
There are all these ways of organizing things. And tweeking. And making things easy! This I need. Especially now.

Open House at the school was very busy. I ended up staying in the bread baking room to help out and never got the chance to mingle downstairs or purchase Waldorfy items. It was nice to chat with some new families who are considering Waldorf.

Of course the visiting dads were all, "Will my child know the quadradic equation by the time they graduate Kindergarten?" and we, the crazy Anthropops were all, "Oh No!!! All we ever do is sheer sheep and spin wool and don't you know books are the devil's work!?" but luckily some Waldorf graduates were present and they sort of calmed everyone down by saying stuff like, "Really! You people act like you never met before. Please let me introduce you, again..." so esoteric. (Please forgive me for joking like this. It must be done.)

But I AM a hopeless salesperson. My attitude has got to change. I really do understand that Waldorf education isn't for everyone. I just don't understand why.

I was recently accused (or so it felt) of being high and mighty, that is, someone told me, "Do you think your family or the world owe you something?" And my response is, yes. They owe me the privilege of belonging. When I am in pain I don't want to be told to "suck it up", do you? I want to be held. If not literally, figuratively. But the liability of growing up in New England (a place I will always love) is a sort of rugged individualism. Get on with it! So here I am. And here I go. Getting on with it.

It is snail season again. Time for me to gaze lovingly and in awe of these steadfast creatures.

We went to the hospital (Raffles) today for day surgery, (routine stuff for the H) and both my husband and I marvelled at the tendency of doctors here to wildly prescribe, prescribe, Prescribe! And the things they say! They speak as if the body is made up of independently moving parts.

This Saturday is Open Day at the Waldorf Kinder. Lots of games and food and crafty items. I haven't lifted a finger. It is my last chance to slack before I become a Waldorf Kinder parent. And when you become a PARENT of a Waldorf student it is all work, work, work! So here I am, barely employed shirking my duty as the new Administrator for the school. Truth is, I am totally over my head taking on this job. I am going to have to learn a lot in the next few months- web design, graphic design, and the detestable excel to name a few things. If you know anything about html please write to me.


Turtle loaf (the one with all the bumpies) and snail bread by mom and booty.

Lots of things on my mind. Reading "The Secret History of the World" by Jonathan Black. Pondering the 10 suicides at the factory in China (and the increase in attacks on schoolchildren in China). The 4th Japanese prime minister to resign in 4 years. The Thai rebellion. And the BP oil spill. Like everyone, I have questions but I feel it is important where I try to find the answers. I don't think companies like Goldman Sachs can act ethically without incentives. And I don't think I can reasonably understand other cultures without putting the lens of my own culture over my eyes. What am I doing here if not to learn something about how to understand the world?

New Projects:

ABC book for Waldorf homeschoolers and people who want to see what first graders do with letters.
An extended day program at the kindergarten for multi-age group.
Craft camp next month for five days.
Waldorf Administrator for the Waldorf Steiner Education Association (Singapore).
Public Talk series with once a month talk on element of Waldorf Education.
Enrichment Program on Saturdays for children 6-11 (ongoing)
Craft parent education (pay per class)

Rachel Maddow is on fire. She was sounding to me a little like a serious, female version of Jon Stewart. This video is long but I think interesting because she talks about how a US Senate candidate for Kentucky (Rand Paul) has struck the tuning fork for racism in America. I agree.

The sun woke me up this morning, (not the cats or the girl). It was nice.
We rode the bikes (and burley) to get coffee and bagels then to the big playground we just discovered in our neighborhood. Booty likes the adult section better than the children's section, so we hung out there checking out the exercise equipment. Next door there is a croquet court and it is always busy with local people playing. Today there was a tournament. You could hear them calling out after shots, "Ahhhh!" or sometimes they sneak in a little english, "You never see that ball!". On our way to unlock the bikes we came upon the familiar site of the Filipino aunties sitting with their employer's dogs. The dogs were leashed to the children's climbing structure and when I tried to say hi to one little Jack Russel he bit me. I couldn't explain to the woman that dogs bite when they are leashed too much and not walked enough. Oh well. Some doggies are like this also.

Last week we went to my friend Nikki's house in the center of town. She has two shelter dogs. Both are more gentle than most dogs I know. George, the shepherd mix ambled up to the gate when we arrived, sniffed and wagged his tail. Very gentle and lovely. The entire visit was filled with sweet dog sniffs and one gentle and tender dog lick from Sidney. It made me long for doggie love. Some dogs are like THIS also.

Starting a new project of alphabet book, in the first grade Waldorf main lesson book style. See "A" above.

Last night I went on skype and was able to see, and be seen by, my friend in Chicago. My new MacBook has a built in video camera. What a treat. Not alone! Not Alone!!

This morning I went to a learning center called Julia Gabriel downtown Singapore. It is a hugely successful business for families who want their children to be more expressive and interactive with their learning. It runs mostly on the weekends and each class for children ages 2-18 lasts for one to one and a half hours. It reminded me of the way I taught public school in Chicago. The teachers are real lovers of learning and of children. Unfortunately for me it would be a step back from what I really believe in, which is letting children experience their own development through the body and the arts before the intellect is tapped. It seems that the children were enjoying themselves in the small classroom but my perspective is that they are pushed too far into what we call "parts thinking" and not so much into the gesture of language- the sounds and their meanings, the numbers and their relationship to the whole world. Just because you can read doesn't mean you have a healthy, balanced relationship to language. And this creates thinkers that are not able or willing to solve big problems. Just small ones. Which may lead to problems in the big world.

Imagine you have dry lips and they are so chapped nothing you put on them helps but the doctors decide to give you a special cream with hormones to solve your problem. The cream causes more serious problems and your original problem was only dehydration. Why don't we treat illness like whole body illness? Why can't we educate the whole child?

What Singapore needs is sensory integration schooling. The children need to feel their bodies (clay, tumbling on a mat, art, singing, marching, climbing etc.) and feel themselves in the world as important and loved. Not like little students with their portfolios.

Singapore just earned the title "most competitive nation". How dreadful.

Whatcha readin"?

Right now I am reading "The Story of Forgetting" by Stefan Merrill Block and "Blink" by Malcolm Gladwell. Having already read, "What the dog saw", "The Tipping Point" and "Outliers" I figured I should read the best seller. I like Malcolm Gladwell's work.

Movies?

Watched Douglas Fairbanks' "Thief of Bagdad" last week and LOVED it, which surprised me because it is a silent movie. But it includes a magic rope, magic carpet, white winged horse, mermaids, a dragon, a very excellent evil khan Mongal, and lots more.
And last night "Grapes of Wrath" a John Ford adaptation of Steinbeck's novel.
the cast is phenomenal (Henry Fonda!!!) and the screenplay excellent.

For the last few weeks we have had a Filipino Eurythmist stay with us, Grace. She is so warm and fun to talk to. Booty loves having the company. And Mr.D is doing some therapy with her which is really great! Selamat Grace! (Thank you in Filipino)

Girl. How I feel too!

I am grateful for:

My beautiful daughter, my lovely house, my helpful live-in maid, my strong body, my loving heart, my Guru, Rudolf Steiner, my friends and family altho' they seem like a dream from a long ago time, my cats when they aren't waking me up, my husband who hasn't quite given up on me yet (I hope), and the divine light that keeps me optimistic despite my feelings of hopelessness.

That which makes me feel crazy and finished:

Many things...
but I know this too will pass.

When I went to long Kreeya today (breathing meditation with Art of Living fellows) I was followed into the building by a short old man with a beard and a fez. He asked me a question which I didn't understand as I pressed the elevator button. He seemed lost. He pointed up and I said, "Art of Living meditation" which he didn't understand but as I had put my hand gently on his shoulder he put his hand on my waist and then before I knew it he was patting my butt. I (again) gently pulled his hand away. And as the empty elevator door opened I quickly asked myself if I could hold my own with this guy, yes. I waved him in first. I wasn't going to fall for that again. As we rode up he asked his question again and again I didn't understand so again (he he) I said, "Art of Living meditation". "Meditation!" he smiled and I got off the elevator.

My friend at meditation seemed shocked to see my short hair. I cut it again last week. It is funny how differently people from the east react to short hair on women. Why did you do it???!!! Like there was some sort of drastic reason. I like my hair super short. I am also aware that I look very masculine with short hair so I try to wear make up and dress a little nicer. But I certainly didn't cut my hair to shock or offend anyone. People from the US and from Europe don't seem to be affected by it. I know I am generalizing but I had short hair in Chicago for many years and it was never an issue. Well, except for my mum. She does not like it short.

Why is it so hard to find lumber!
Or a play structure/frame for the booty!
I have been searching online for hours and failed to find plywood to build something (like a climbing wall for the girl) or a wooden play structure like this (by Plum in the UK) for our back yard.

Please spread the word!

This is a pretty cool project and if you pitch in you will get a very unique "comic book style" portrait. C'mon! The artist only has two weeks to raise his goal! Just check it out:
Click here: Portrait Project

Also for more examples of Ryan-Alexander Tanner's work click here:

www.ohyesverynice.com

My picture of the Oriental Pied Hornbill



And



Wild Singapore's picture

For Nature Lovers, YES! For foodies, Oh No!

I found our week-end to be a big YES! and a big OH, NO!

The island of Palau Ubin is a fifteen minute bum boat ride from Singapore and the difference between the two places is quite breathtaking. Palau Ubin does not have electricity, it runs on generators. It is mostly jungle and mangrove swamp. There are 4 vans on the island. Downtown boasts of two restaurants, two convenience shops and a bike rental shop. Temples outnumber any other establishment.

On Palau Island there is a nature conservation area called Chek Jawa. We rented bikes and rode there from our hotel. We also visited the next day. We saw an Oriental Pied Hornbill, amazing! A wild boar and her piglets by the shore. Mudskippers!!!



It was quite hot and our hotel was the only place with AC. We stayed at the vastly disappointing Celestial Resort where the rooms are unfinished (see handy man 1, 2 and 3 trying to fix our knobless bedroom door behind which is a trapped husband).



Where "American breakfast" consists of an overeasy egg, 2 hotdogs, canned beans and instant coffee with creamer. While the downtown mom and pop restaurants had veg fried rice, tofu dishes, prawn, fish, chicken, pork, beef and various vegetables the resort restaurant (the very poor Hornbill Restaurant) had a very limited menu especially for the vegetarian eater (many unavailable items) due to "rationing", I was told. Service was also very slow and the background music constisted of Best Hits of the Eagles. My own personal nightmare especially when all one wanted to do was gaze out over the lagoon eating fish and sipping a cold Tiger. For each dinner I relied on my old stand by, fresh thai coconut, rice, salted fish and baby kailan (spinach). YUM! Poor husband, who was not drinking or eating any sugar had to make due with sauteed veggies in a non-descript gravy. By the end of our stay we were sitting down with staff management and giving them a list of things they could improve on. While it was nice of them to listen, we were still overcharged for our "suite" and there was no compensation for our troubles (getting locked in, lack of food, reluctance of chef to "prepare" food etc.)



At the fish spa we hired an army of fish to nibble the dead skin off our feet. At first the sensation is almost unbearable but then you get used to it.



Giant fan palms!!


And Nurse sharks that live in the Lagoon.

Singapore English = Singlish

One stormy morning last week we found the living room floor blanketed with termites. There were little pulsing piles of them in spots, still slightly alive I guess.

Yesterday Booty and I had to leave the house for the day so the pest control dudes could come and rid us of our termites. They needed to rip up several floor boards as the bugs were living inside.

Booty and I spent the morning at Rochester House, a new hang out spot for moms on the west side of Singapore. Rochester House is an outdoor cafe (slightly upscale) which reflects the neighborhood (swank) with an adjoining bungalow house designed for play. The first floor is set up entirely with toys and activities for the 1-6 year old and the second floor is for the older (read jaded) children who play video games and watch movies while mom and dad sip espresso or dine. This location used to be home to the restaurant Cassis. It has been open for 2 weeks.

Booty was in heaven and played for 2 hours with all the loud toys she would never have at home. Then she sat for another hour with me and ate lasagne (basania). A little lady she is becoming.

We rode the train home from Buena Vista (a 35 minute train ride) and cabbed it from Bedock. When we returned home after 230 the house was still topsy turvy. The entrance door had the frame ripped out and the furniture was piled up in the middle of the floor.

Tomorrow we are going to Celestial Resort in Pulau Ubin. We will take a bum boat out from Changi ferry. It will be a rustic vacation, and cheaper. So it suits me fine. Also a 10 minute bumboat ride from Singapore. How can you beat that? I know, just stay home huh?

We may not be going anywhere this weekend due to the fact that some unnamed people don't check their passports to see if they have enough pages left for a Visa stamp.
My first thought when I found out was to send a text U R an A** but I edited myself and sat myself down for practice and shut my mouth the heck up. My second thought later was, "so little time so much to get angry about".

When I think these unwelcome thoughts I have to ask myself, "Why are you angry? Does it mean so much to you?" And my answer is of course, "No." SO?

Issues of anger come up again and again for me. This started when I got married and has grown worse the farther away from home I am. And what is home?

Exactly.
Where is safety? I am finding out that safety HAS to be inside me or I am in a deep mess of doo.

This is why I have been taking the time during my "sabbatical" to do some inner work.

Oh. And another thing.
We may not be going to the US this summer due to a number of reasons but the biggest one is that I need to jump start my life so that when I do go back to the States I am returning to a job, life, work etc. I can't continue to enter into other people's culture if I don't have mine fermenting as well.

The math talk went well but I have been down with an upper respitory "thing" since. And now Booty has it as well.

On the up side, hopefully we will be in good shape by next weekend when we are planning on going to Batam (45 min. ferry ride) with our friends Harpreet and Simi (and their 3 kids).

On the down side, Booty has an incredible cold. And the exterminators are coming tomorrow to start dealing with our TERMITES. Which means out of the house for 6 hours.

On the up side, Booty is sleeping and drinking tea and soup.

Upcoming talk by Elizabeth Doshi

Did you "hate" math growing up? Or does your child dislike it now? Perhaps you are wondering if it matters how math is taught in schools as long as the students "get it". Explore these questions and find out how one Waldorf teacher discovered her hidden love of math.

"Moving Mathematics: A comparative look at the teaching of mathematics in Waldorf and mainstream schools."

Date: Saturday, 17 April

Time: 2-4 pm

Venue: 72 Elite Park Ave


A teaser from my talk...

Why compare mainstream or private school math pedagogy with Waldorf school's? I am interested in exploring how children develop their relationship to their learning (in particular math). I was not fond of math as a child. Was it me or my teachers? In order to answer this we need to ask, What are the ways in which we introduce math topics and teach them? As children grow, does math teaching change? Another important perspective I need to share today is the different methods of evalutation in the public and private sector which I believe makes a profound difference in teaching, specifically the practice of testing compared to assessment. Which comes first, the test or the child? And finally I want to ask one of the most important questions, the one that becomes the hidden lesson “Each day what is being offered to the students or, what is being educated in the child?”

Le renard et l'enfant

A beautiful nature film but with a harsh ending.
Magical and innocent and then at the end suddenly the film turns the young girl ugly-like she grew up and became exploitive.
Warning to parents with young children, don't let your kids watch after the girl "plays leash" with the fox at a logging site. I was a bit surprised at the change of tone.
A morality film?

Finally finished, "The Primal Wound" by Nancy Verrier.



I think the book is very valuable. But not just for those who are adopted. If you have lost your mother (even temporarily) because of death, physical illness, divorce, workaholism, or psychological illness you will see yourself in this book. For many adopted people this book was a breakthrough- verbalizing all kinds of hidden feelings and thoughts. Nancy Verrier is a wonderful speaker and has a great deal of courage to bring forth ideas that are highly controversial and difficult to define.

My only objection to this book is the omission of the spiritual element of destiny. Stop reading now if you don't believe in this mumbo jumbo but I do, so I will continue. If you believe, as I do, that you choose your parents. You also choose your adoptive parents. This means you have a specific destiny with your adopted family, just as you have a genetic destiny that was provided by your birth parents.
By omitting this, you portray the child as a victim who must be healed by destiny issues. This doesn't make sense to me.

My adopting/adopted friends are ALL aware of the genetic differences of their children and they honor these differences and when possible provide occasions for their children to "see themselves" in other faces, and to belong to groups that help to describe their identity. And as our children grow we begin to invite conversations around how we are different and how we can do better.

We are living in a very different time. Many of us have and will return to our children's homelands, (sometimes to work and ease suffering). Most of our friends have helped communities build wells, hospitals, libraries and schools. And there are even families I know who are helping to support organizations that keep children with their mothers, (like in Korea).

I like to focus on the positive and would have liked to have seen some solutions or "ideal situations", instead the ending focused on the physical body of the adopted child.

How about the whole child? Those beautiful eyes! That great singing voice! And Oh! That sense of humor and love of life!!!

It is a long road I know. And as a mom I fail miserably more often than I would like. But I really believe our daughter belongs to us and we belong to her. That means we are all Ethiopian, Indian, and American in our family.
With a dash of Sing-a-POH
LA!

Terima Kasih (Thank You)
Isn't It?

On Tuesday night with my heart in my throat I got into a cab and headed for the airport. Waiting to board the plane to Bali a rainbow blossomed in the sky. Still I felt lost without the person (my daughter) I have spent the last 2 years with 7 days a week.

Landed, after 2 hour flight, in Bali at 940pm. The streets were filled with motorcycles and it had rained. The cab window was open and one motorcyclist rode through a puddle next to the cab and the water came in and splashed my face. I wiped off my glasses and decided not to be indignant.

The retreat/AMC (advanced Meditation Course) was held at the Inna Grand Bali Beach Resort
and my room overlooked the beach and sea.



First night of the AMC (Amateur Meditation Course) we all boarded a cruise ship and had dinner and satsang with Guruji. The speakers were abusively loud but I was a smart cookie and brought earplugs which were in place the entire evening. Too bad I couldn't really enjoy the Bajhan singer, Siddharth Mohan who's voice is very wonderful. Luckily, Guruji winked at me and that makes up for anything bad that happened. (I realize he may have winked at someone else but the feeling at the time was that we connected so who cares?)



Morning practice at 545 is on the beach with the ants and spiders. :)
And lead by Kumlesh who is a Sri Sri Yoga teacher based in the Bangalore ashram and without a doubt one of the most accomplished teachers I have had in Art of Living. Warm, silly, competent, gifted and gorgeous- her form is very balanced. We practiced long Kreeya, Padma Sadana, Sun Salutation and Silliness 101.

Throughout the course the sound system feedback and unexpected stops and starts, added to the constant cell phone ringing, sneezing, coughing, belching, snoring and unearthly noises from people in a deep state of nothingness, all brought me to a state of giddiness unrivaled in my life. It was so beyond the beyond it was hilarious. I began instead of meditating, to entertain myself with What if... At one point I started laughing out of control and the beautiful Swami (Jotimaya) gave me a penetrating look.



The first afternoon we were instructed to change halls and when we arrived Swamiji was giving his blessing. I sat in disbelief for an hour watching the line of people receiving his hand on their heads. My thoughts went from,
"What a waste of time! I don't even know this swami. Why should I get up and stand in line. Don't we have real work to do?"
to
"Look at the way everone's face softens as they approach the swami. Look at how humble people are as they stand before this man, who looks like he is watching a beautiful sunset and who's arm seems untiring."
Just before the last person was blessed I got up and when his hand went to my head I thought of the energy of 100 hugs directed to him. When I looked up he was smiling at me- in understanding. He got my hugs!

In the evening I took the Sahaj Samadhi course and was given a mantra. At first I didn't like my mantra. I had a hard time saying it in my head, (the mantra is a secret that shouldn't be uttered aloud). Eventually it became natural and started to do its "magic".

Most of the Russian group did not engage with anyone outside of their group, that is, no smiling, eye contact, seva, or waiting in line. Perhaps they didn't understand the instructions. But surely they didn't comprehend that it is the Indians' job to cut in line. I thought, "When we are out of silence someone ought to set them straight on this matter."

There were translators for some of the many countries participating.
1 Argentina 2 Australia
3 Austria 4 Bahrain
5 Belgium 6 Brazil
7 Bulgaria 8 Cambodia
9 Canada 10 China
11 Cyprus 12 Denmark
13 Egypt 14 Estonia
15 Finland 16 France
17 Germany 18 Greece
19 Hungary 20 Iceland
21 India 22 Iran
23 Ireland 24 Italy
25 Japan 26 Kuwait
27 Laos 28 Liechtenstein
29 Luxembourg 30 Maldives
31 Malta 32 Mexico
33 Monaco 34 Netherlands
35 New Zealand 36 Norway
37 Oman 38 Poland
39 Portugal 40 Qatar
41 Russia 42 Saudi Arabia
43 South Africa 44 South Korea
45 Spain 46 Surinam
47 Sweden 48 Switzerland
49 Taiwan Territory 50 United Arab Emirates
51 United Kingdom 52 USA

The feedback from the earpieces being worn by those using the translators sounded quite painful at times. No swearing was heard during the entire course. However, during an especially physically difficult practice there were several Chinese men who cried out in Mandarin what sounded like profanities. My friend Joo Hymn let me know they were actually saying stuff like, "I love my entire family!!!!" A good lesson huh?

One of the reasons I was able to sit for most of the day was the twice daily hike to and from the first to tenth floor of the resort. Whenever there was cleaning in one hall the organizers would switch the location of the course to the other hall. The elevators only held 8-10 people at a time and were extremely slow so moving 500 people via 3 elevators didn't seem like a good option for me ( 18 elevator trips) and when I took into consideration that my a** was taking such a beating from all the crossed-leg sitting we were doing I had to take the stairs.



I didn't figure out how to get hot water or AC until the third day. Who would have thought that this button would be the answer to these problems?

Got very hungry at one point in the middle of the course and bought a milk (!!!) chocolate bar with almonds. I don't usually enjoy milk chocolate, but I felt like Charlie eating his first Wonka chocolate. Delicious. Later, my stomach was a little disappointed with my choice as I had until then been eating fruit and salad with rice and dal.

Being in silence when the world around you is cacophonous is a practice fit for our times and well worth the effort. Being in silence when given a seva activity can be a little tricky. I was told to clean the beach of all garbage and leaves. After an hour of cleaning the shore and removing with my bare hands all the trash from the cement garbage catches I was then told to put all the trash back into the same catches I had removed it from, (instead of putting it in a dumpster as I had thought).

Want Nothing
Do Nothing
Be Nothing

This is Something!
As it is hard for the Go! person inside me.
Advice to people like me:
Get lots of excersize and at the very least do 30 minutes of yoga before you do your sitting practice.

After coming out of silence most of my friends wept in gratitude. I did not. I think I was still laughing inside.



On the last day we were arranged in country groups (I with the Singapore group-my friends) and Sri Sri Ravi Shankar my guru made the rounds.
"Are you happy?"



The next morning I went for a swim with JH and then to the spa for a massage which was Heaven! Nothing like my appointments with pain. But then again I was in pretty good shape when I lay down for treatment. A beautiful spa! Ginger tea after in this beautiful garden. KISS!

Two days of fasting have passed and I am on a strict- Silence Meditation course- diet. This means I am taking the headache and body aches that occur when one removes all the caffeine and sweets to which one is accustomed BEFORE the course. The first two days were strict fresh squeezed juices and broth days. Bad headache. And body aches the second day. Stupidly, we decided to bring the girl to Wild Wild Wet and only lasted an hour-with pounding music and lots of screaming kids. Booty finally got her fries and she ate them with a seriousness I have seen only in NASA think stations.

Today my body is still not 100%. I went for a two hour pain treatment, I mean massage. One would think I am a dedicated masochist but I am convinced that my body is out of wack and needs to be wacked back into its rightful place. I had a few words to say to the therapist tho',

"Hey do you think you could make an exception for once and go a little easy on me?

I could go easy but the best way is to go to the painful spots and release the block.

But what if I am experiencing pain the whole two hours? Thats not right is it? I mean the idea is that I get to relax a little. I am almost nauseous with pain right now."

He eased up a bit and actually there were a few really excellent moments especially when he wasn't working on my calves, feet, shoulders, and back. I guess that leaves my a** and my head.

Free your mind and your a** will follow
or rather
Free your mind and your a** will follow...
immediately.
The rest takes time.


Also today the therapist decided since he was the only english speaker on staff he would take all the phone calls.
While he was working on me.
After the 6th call I asked him if he was planning on taking calls the whole time. He gave his excuse and then admitted to feeling bad about it.
"If you feel bad about it, don't do it! It feels like you aren't prioritizing the customer you have. You are prioritizing the customers to be. It doesn't make sense!"
No phone calls after that.
And the next hour was so much better.

Field trip to the Jurong Bird Park.
We have been before but this time we went early when it was still a civilized temperature outside. And during the week the park is very quiet and peaceful.
Altho' I didn't feel entirely restful when I finished buying our admission tickets (SGD$35!) and couldn't see Booty. I calmly walked through the entrance with my tickets- they never asked where is the child for this ticket? And there she was strolling along as if she was enjoying the park solo for the day. Lecturing a 3 year old is one of the most unsatisfying pursuits and yet one feels obliged to do it in situations like these, (so that is what the child-leashes are for!) I explained to her that unless she wanted to hold my hand she would have to stay close and listen when I called to her. OK she told me. Hey Booty. Distracted looking out into space. No running off please.

We hopped on the panorail and viewed the bird habitats from way up high, got out at the African Waterfall Aviary. We hiked up to the waterfall which was lovely but Very buggy, and managed to get bitten (despite bug spray). On the way down we fed some beautiful African Starlings (Superb, Purple Glossy, Lesser Blue-eared, Wattled, Violet, Hildebrandt and Emerald) with worms in our outstretched hands. Yes! Booty did it too!

Then we took the tram back to African Wetlands. But little girl wanted to ride on the automated kiddy rides. I didn't have coins so I asked her to come with me to get some.



Eventually I got some change and she was able to ride (above) and then we cooled off in the Penguin house. On the way out she grabbed as many stuffed penguins as she could at the gift shop, (they place them there strategically). When I asked her to put them back she began to scream. You know, those shrieks that do not mean pain but rather indignation? Then we took pictures of her holding the Parrots and were just about to grab some fries and ice cream when...

she ran off again. When I saw her at a distance I called her, "C'mon Booty lets get some french fries!" but she smiled and ran in another direction and climbed onto one of the mobility scooter rentals and started pushing buttons. The staff ignored her.

At this point it was about 11:30 and we were planning on staying a bit longer but I felt that this was an opportunity for some follow through. I walked over to where she was and gently scooped her up and proceded to exit the park walking by the cow sculpture she had wanted to climb on and the cafe.

"I want some french fries mommy!"
"I am sorry but when you run away from mommy like that it means its time to go."
Screams and cries. Shrieks and Shrill imprecations!
Once we were in the cab. She started again but quieter,
"I want french fries."
"I know sweety. Maybe next time. There will always be a next time."

After she woke up from her nap,
"Can I have ice cream and french fries now mommy?"

One afternoon Booty started to sing this song. And for those of you who know me, know that Sly and the Family Stone and especially this particular album remain for me one of the most satisfying and joyful. This is still true today. Later that day I asked MB and she told me she had taught it to her. :)

So now this song is on our evening after story song list. Usually, I tell Booty a story in the dark. It is usually the same story for a month or so, (as she likes it). We just finished with the 3 little pigs and are telling a story about the elementals (earth, fire, air and water). Then we sing 2-4 songs. Here are the songs we are singing now.

Que Sera sera
Leaving on a Jet plane
Swing Low
Who built the ark?
Pitter patter pitter patter (listen to the rain)
This Land is your land (mommy this was your first song!)

Booty walked all the way to the train station today. A 30 minute walk for a 3 year old. I told her now that she is 3 she is able to walk to the station instead of riding in her stroller. We talked along the bikepath, which is mostly pleasant. She noticed people walking their dogs and shiny cars, one of which she decided to touch.
"Ooo momma, that car is hot!"
I reminded her that when we are out in the world it is best not to touch EVERYTHING.
And as we passed a young woman jogging she said,
"She's not touching everything!" and as she pointed to the woman she touched her.
Luckily, the woman was not offended.
"I made a mistake momma. I touched her. Next time I ask 'commission', can I touch you?"

On to the station. When we boarded the train someone gave up their seat for Booty. I struck up a conversation with a woman who, she told me later, was "tatting". This is a form of crocheting, but much more defined. She gave me the name of a shop near my Doctor's office that sells supplies and holds classes.

We got off at Bugis and took the escalator to BHG (Be here for good things), a department store and up again to the third floor to the children's department to buy some walking shoes. It seems all Booty has is flip flops and crocs.

Barbie, Disney, Legos brand, Hello Kitty!, Strawberry Shortcake and a brand named Sweet were the only offerings in size 26 sneakers.
And the color choice was...
PINK. shades of. Sequins and glitter and Bling!
Of course Booty was all over the Barbie sparkly, and Disney Princess sneakers.
"Sorry." I said to her predictably and began one of my familiar refrains,
"I am not paying to advertise for a corporation I don't even like."
Lots of raised eyebrows. (Crazy white lady with child on aisle 4)

We had to settle for a pair of pink and brown Lego brand high top style sneakers, (the logo is hidden on the tongue flap). I bought some lacy socks to girl it up a bit.

She wore them home.

We stopped in the food court and got some juicy Chicken satay. She went back for seconds. And bought some cookies and a freshly baked eclair for me (one of my weaknesses).

We got a seat (Again!) on the train on the way home and Booty was able to look out the window while leaning up against an elderly Singaporean woman, who smiled when the girl finally noticed she was practically in the woman's arms.

Cabbed it home from the station (too hot to walk) and Bee-phia (her nickname for herself) took a nap.

Just finished making some bagels. Sat on the kitchen floor listening but not understanding H's mom and dad speaking Gujurati while I stared at the bagels baking. Sweating.

And now I better get "practiced" before I leave for my course- 4 straight days of silence and meditation. I hear the girl screaming loudly.

Breathe.

Annie Leonard and Free Range Studios strike again with the story of Bottled Water!

Happy Birthday Surekha MOM!




We received some beautiful buntings in the mail today to celebrate the birthdays we are having this week. This lovely Japanese floral print bunting (detail is shown in enlarged photo by creator) is made by Solohandmade, a handcrafted home items store in the Netherlands founded and run by a fellow Bostonian-adoptmom-expat. She makes me crazy with love and envy- if only I could create such magical things! I would be worthy!

Tonite homemade pizza and icecream from Ice Cream Chefs! which is down the road, (don't hit the link unless you don't mind inane music box music). This was mom's request and we are curious to see if this store will live up to our imaginings. We are getting mocha chip, creme brulee and strawberries and cream iceream. They also have more adventurous flavors but I have learned the hard way with the bean paste icecream and the DURIAN. Link provided to show you that I can be fair altho' I think durian is one of God's mistakes, sort of like bungi jumping.

Lots of Indian food on the menu for the next few weeks!
And in one week I will be going to BALI for the Art of Living Part 2 Silence course. Yes!
I get to be quiet for 5 days. The mind will rest. In preparation I will be fasting for the three days prior and taking myself off processed sugar, coffee, and tea. This means just veggie broth, decaffenated tea, lemon water and juice for me.

This Is What An Internet Scam looks like. I received this several days ago and share this with you. I contacted the individual that this scammer is imitating but no report has been made.
All names have been removed but not the $details.

Hello,

How are you doing? I hope this email reaches you on time, i had a trip to the United Kingdom, but unfortunately for me i got mugged at the park of the hotel,all my cash, credit card and cell-phone were taken away from me. I don't even have a phone where i can be reached right now because of my hotel bill.

Presently my things are been held down by the hotel management due to my inability to pay the hotel bills which i currently owe, they even had to restrict my access to the hotel facilitates until outstanding bills are cleared and i don't have a dime on me again,i had to walk down to the city library in order to send you this email.

I need you to kindly assist me with about 1,280:08 Pounds so that i can settle the hotel bills and make arrangement to return back home, please let me know how much you can assist me with soonest.

Thanks,
S****

Oh S****
I am sorry I didn't receive this until just now.
But anyway. I am also sorry I don't have 1000 pounds.
I am thinking of you and hoping you are ok.
Best,
XXXX

I really appreciate your prompt response and concern about my situation. i will appreciate whatever you can afford to send right away. things are really in a bad shape here so i need to leave here soonest.

Below is the details you need to send money to me through western union money transfer:

Receiver Name: S**** ***
Address: ### Romford Road
City: Stratford, London
Postcode: E15 3NS
Country: United Kingdom.

As soon as you send the money kindly email me the transfer detail or scan and send the transfer receipt as an attachment.
Thanks once again.

I wonder what would happen if someone went to that location looking for that Identity thief.

We wish you a Happy Birthday
A joyful and celebrated birthday
to our dear Sun Booty
May you have a long, healthy life!

The grandparents are here! And this morning our dear Masami did a short birthday puppet story for Booty! So, after a request from the girl for pictures of her birth mother (I want to see me coming out of her tummy!)- we did a slideshow for her of our trip to Ethiopia including pictures of our time with her birth family.
Tomorrow Raj's family will come over for snacks and cake.

Last night we went to one of the many glam malls in Singapore. This one is called "Iluma" because the facade of the mall is made up of light cells that illuminate in a wave so it looks like Las Vegas. We had an unsatisfactory meal at Manhattan Fish House and something like icecream at Marble stone Creamery before we went to see "Up in the Air"- our second choice, (The Hurt Locker was sold out).
H did not much care for the movie but thought the woman who played Alex was quite good. I enjoyed it. But I am not as picky now when I see american films, so homesick am I .

She was known to drink coffee from a bag.

The first installment of my autobiography



Once upon a time...
there lived a strange, STRANGE woman.