After putting my beauty booty to bed I decided to spend the rest of the evening with PJ Harvey. I listened to Terri Gross' interview from last year and downloaded "Let England Shake" which is brilliant and devastating. This is an album about war, death, beauty, country loyalty, home and is a big departure from much of Harvey's previous work in that it seems like she has moved beyond the personal and into the inspired.

War photographer, Seamus Murphy directed 12 short films to accompany the songs on the album.

Here are PJ Harvey's words:


"Death was everywhere,
in the air
and in the sounds
coming off the mounds
of Bolton's Ridge.
Death's anchorage.
When you rolled a smoke
or told a joke,
it was in the laughter
and drinking water
it approached the beach
as strings of cutters,
dropped into the sea and lay around us.

Death was in the ancient fortress,
shelled by a million bullets
from gunners, waiting in the copses
with hearts that threatened to pop their boxes,
as we advanced into the sun
death was all and everyone.

Death hung in the smoke and clung
to 400 acres of useless beachfront.
A bank of red earth, dripping down death
now, and now, and now
in the air
and in the sounds
coming off the mounds
of Bolton's Ridge.
Death's anchorage.
Death was in the staring sun,
fixing its eyes on everyone.
It rattled the bones of the Light Horsemen
still lying out there in the open

as we, advancing in the sun
sing "Death to all and everyone.""

A whole week off from school.
Strange. But not uncalled for. The road conditions since late Tuesday have been increasingly challenging with the latest ice storm impossible to drive in.
We have been told it will soon melt but as of now, 9:30 am we still have an inch of ice covering everything.

Last night we built another fire (we are running out of wood), made popcorn(the last of it) and watched Singing in the Rain. Booty laughed hysterically at the part of the movie when Donald O'Connor sings, Make 'em Laugh.

Our fish, Sophie and Lena (not related to Lena Lamont) are doing very well. They do seem a bit food obsessed but we too have been a little food glutted during this storm. I believe I reached the sugar-saturation stage experienced by most shut ins yesterday afternoon after demolishing a Lindt orange liquor and Dark chocolate bar with a slice of Wednesday's granola crumble apple pie.

Time for us to get out!

Recorded two days ago in Seattle.

Now an ice storm.
Booty is outside on the back pork attacking the ice-crutsted snow with a small rake.
We have an ice phenomena happening today that doesn't usually happen (well snow doesn't usually happen either) in this area.

If you are from the Northeast this kind of thing is commonplace but if you know a little about weather and how it is affected by the geography etc. you know that sometimes events like this are so addictive. I can't get enough information.

For more good Seattle area weather information check out this awesome blog:

Cliff Mass'

Happy Birthday, Martin Luther King Jr.!
We have had one seriously exciting week!



We were so excited to see how Booty would react to her first snow. So thrilled that Mr. D was able to witness it, (and take a picture or two).





Tuesday and Wednesday our school called a snow day. We ended up making apple pie, soup, pancakes, setting up an aquarium...



Building a fire, reading and playing lots and lots of Mancala and Uno.



And it feels pretty complete. However, we have another snow day tomorrow. That leaves us with one day of school this week.

Tonight I sang the Martin Luther King song for Booty,

"We bake a cake. We blow it out.
Happy Martin Luther King we shout.
I have a dream, he said
All people hand in hand
Working and singing throughout the land."

Christmas may be over but we are still celebrating.
Today we returned from Portland, Oregon; a lovely 2 day trip filled with lots of good food (Ethiopian, Thai and Organic)and a little bit of Musical theater (Willy Wanka) at Northwest Children's Theater and School and lovely cousin time (with David who has lived in Portland for 20 years). Before the show we survived the Children's Museum (much too crowded to enjoy).
We went to Voodoo Doughnuts and enjoyed the decadence of sweets unholy and then went to Craven Raven for the holy gluten free version.

The weather has been mild and sunny for December. Three cheers for a great New Year! Lets hope we find more clarity and belongingness than ever before!!!!!

Our friend Toni sent us one of these and we were inspired so here is our version:

Jib Jab Christmas song from our family

Happy, Merry and Joy to all you naughty children!

Nutcracker bound. Christmas Revels up next!

Living the days like each day is a vacation
Something special is happening!
Lots of conflict means lots of activity
and possibility
for healing.
The students are naughty
so we can be good.
The students endure
so we can make mistakes.

And learn

of course!

Our school is going through a major crisis and I haven't posted because I haven't been able to write it down. Without blaming anyone it seems that the school is experiencing a potentially lethal fiscal situation. Because of this the school is losing students every day. I am not sure if I will be employed next month but will keep you posted.

Today the weather is lovely with blue skies. A bald eagle flew over the playground and the children cried out to it.

Interesting times.

It has been over a week since we started at The Tacoma Waldorf School. Booty is enjoying it but prefers not to stay for after-care which is unavoidable when I am teaching. Otherwise, students are beginning to adjust and I am beginning to learn how to teach them. Mostly, just re-evaluating my expectations.

Mt. Rainier looms large, the passing freight trains enter our dream-life and the sigh inducing sunsets hold on just a little longer.

Getting up mighty early to make sure to do my practice and be ready to leave the house packed and prepared by 730. When monsoon season starts I am sure everything will shift again.

Mr. D continues to travel back and forth from his crazy work meetings yonder to home. I hope his suitcase does not disintegrate en route. It is looking a little battered.

Booty enjoys whatever she is offered. A patch of flowers, a red wagon, gems, anything really especially engagement. Lots and lots of ENGAGEMENT.

The first known name for Mt. Ranier was Tahoma. Maybe Tacoma is a dirivitive of this name. Booty makes a game of finding Mt. Ranier when the sky is clear and we can see east. Mount Rainier is a stratavolcano.

The mountains in this picture (in the distance) are the Olympics. When the sun is shining we can see these beauties over Bremerton/Gig Harbor way.

Our shipment is due to arrive tonight. We should be geared up by next week.

We like our trees BIG!
However, we are still looking for a decent restaurant. I am afraid Tacoma is still experiencing a bit of a "Townie" attitude toward culinary expertise but my fears may be based in ignorance. We shall see.
Today while checking out the nearby community pool I noticed the swimming instructor overseeing his swimmers while wearing jeans and a baseball cap. Not very promising.
On the upside, Booty's camp teacher is a wonderful young college student (and Olympia Waldorf school graduate) who is studying in India next year. She is a blessing to us all!

We finally found a Waldorf job and home to rent in Tacoma. It is in a residential area and overlooks the Puget Sound (see picture). I am very pleased with the house as it has plenty of space for Booty to play outside (both under cover and out in the open) and plenty of nice spots inside for us all to work and play. We move August 1st. It is going to be a busy month!

It is also very close to Port Defiance ferry which takes us to Vashon Island, and our dear friends.

Our blessings are many. Here are a few of them.
How we love A and H.

On our way to Seattle.
We have had our sun.
And our family.
Now we shall see what else is in store for us.
Above, Pemaquid Beach and Dodge Point in Maine.

Today's collection

Highlights from our return home include two great visits with my youngest brother in Cincinnati, a stay at Walden Pond and visits with Vivien, and our reunion in Rockland Maine with gorgeous people and a perfect view.

We are still here in Rockland, thankful for the double rainbow on the sea and yet longing for our homeward bound friends and Mr. D, who is now off on his own adventure.

K's pre-graduation lunch. And the beautiful graduate we all adore.

We are leaving Ohio today after a solidly beneficial visit with minimal conflict.
Booty was able to bond with her cousins in a healthy way (no babying and some good boundary testing). I was able to share the grief of the last 3 years with Mr. D's family and felt heard. Had a very pleasant day with my brother(just the two of us) in Cincinnati and a lovely dinner with him (with Booty and H) at a fairly good Ethio place in the city.

The weather has been pretty good and aside from the shark attack of a seizure at the nephews's graduation (the day before I left for San Diego) all is well, not great mind you but well.

The myth that in middle age life becomes easier is one big laughable prank. On me? On anyone like me who may still be working with the questions in life and learning how to accept moments, crappy and lovely and the feelings that go with them.

Without trying to control them.

The month ahead will be a continuation of suitcase living (not my favorite) and ambiguity around what the next year will hold. My head cannot fathom another year of joblessness. My heart yearns for the healing forces of the natural world. And the stress factor of yet another move, another limbo year has really undermined my strength and patience for the every day bumps and stops.

Sometimes I wonder, is this the dream of groundlessness? The reality that we all fear and avoid?

Here at San Diego airport waiting to board an early flight back to Ohio. On the way to the airport via the car rental shuttle, the driver asked me, "Where is home?" and I nearly broke down and cried.

I may not be without a home but I am surely feeling a lack of belongingness.
Above, the surfing madonna, seen on an underpass in Encinitas. She is also being asked to leave.

Having applied to three different schools and been denied at all three I need to ask the question,

"Why do I long painfully for a home when it is clear the universe wants me to wander?"