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My friend Melanie is a marvel.




She started the Abundance Committee at the school just by inspiring others with her positivity. The kindergarten has been expressing their need for funds for doll and puppet making and voila! Melanie gathered together a group of women to make table puppets. If you know me, I am ALL OVER the puppets. In my first class we spent three quarters of a year making marionettes for our Ramayana puppet play. So, of course I was glad to help make puppets at the school.
30+ puppets made and counting!


Here are the lady puppets I am working on. I am keeping the one dressed elegantly in red.

This entire blog post is lifted with permission from the blogger
No Sleep Til Mysore

FAIR IS FOUL
AND FOUL IS FAIR







The Washington Post recently ran a piece called, "In India's huge marketplace, fair skin sells."

It discusses how Eastern European models with dark hair and light skin are being featured in Indian adverts.


"Indians have a longing for that pure, beautiful white skin. It is too deep-rooted in our psyche," said Enakshi Chakraborty, who heads Eskimo India, a modeling agency that brings East European models here. "Advertisers for international as well as Indian brands call me and say, 'We are looking for a gori [Hindi for white] model with dark hair.' Some ask, 'Do you have white girls who are Indian-looking?' They want white girls who suit the Indian palate."

Indians' color fixation is also evident in classified newspaper ads and on Web sites that help arrange marriages. The descriptive terms used for skin color run the gamut: "very fair," "fair," "wheat-ish," "wheat-ish-medium," "wheat-ish-dark," "dark" and "very dark."

Family elders here commonly comment on a newborn baby's color, after checking out the gender. One of the best-selling skin creams in India is called Fair & Lovely. A men's version, Fair and Handsome, was launched last year.

"The Indian mind-set prefers light skin. My pictures are routinely Photoshopped to make me look a bit lighter -- a lot lighter, actually," Riya Ray, 23, a dark-skinned Indian model, said with a laugh. "But when I work in Britain and France, my color is praised as exotic. It is a two-way trend: Indian models are going abroad, and foreign models are coming here."


I can't help but think of Raj, from my first trip in India back in 2002.

He made frequent trips between Mysore and Bangalore on his silver Honda Hero Super Special motorcycle, and was seriously thinking about getting a helmet.

To protect your head? I asked.

"No, Cadda. To protect face from sun."

Huh?

"So I do not become too dark."

Even Desi TJ - who's lived here for eight years - was concerned last month that his skin looked darker after two months in the Subcontinental sun.

Silly man. Doesn't he know that gori girls dig that sh-t?

Apparently not.

It looks like we will travel out to Addis during the second weekend in February.If Sanbate's adoption is finalized before that, we will save the flight for when we travel her home in March.

Seeing her
sitting there
will be such a feast.
Leaving her there will be an impossible puzzle
but every moment can't be defined.
Let time make us hers.

If she uses it,
it ain't landfill.

Did you notice the cloth diaper and plastic "drop in" bottle liners?
A little contradictory ay?
My excuse is that we will be doing a lot of traveling and uh... how to disinfect the bottle?
You ask, "How to clean the diaper?"
I confess I will be buying "landfill" diapers for travel.

Causticum:

Manifests its action mainly in chronic rheumatic, arthritic and paralytic affections, indicated by the tearing, drawing pains in the muscular and fibrous tissues, seems to choose preferable dark-complexioned and rigid-fibered persons. Restlessness at night, with tearing pains in joints and bones, and faint-like sinking of strength. Burning, rawness, and soreness are characteristic.

Intensely sympathetic
mind; insecure, uncertain, scared; fear; evening;
mind; hysteria;
mind; hurry; while eating;
eye; pain; burning, smarting, gnawing, biting; as if sand in eye;
mouth; teeth; looseness;
abdomen; bladder; urging to urinate;
cough; sensation as though unable to cough deep enough to start mucus;
back; pain; pulling; coccyx (bottom tip of spine); ;
back; pain; in women; during period;
extremities, limbs; skin; itching; like insects crawling on skin;
extremities, limbs; cramps; foot; sole; toes;
Restless legs at night;
sciatica, with numbness;
extremities, limbs; movements and positions; constant movement during sleep;
chorea (convulsive twitching, involuntary movements of limbs);
skin; pain; excoriated (as if grazed, chaffed);
skin; blisters;
skin; varicose;spider veins;
generalities; pulse; frequent, accelerated, rapid; evening;
generalities; twitching;involuntary movements
generalities; flabby feeling;

This is my homeopathic remedy and it is "wicked cool" to see it covers just about ALL of my aches and tendencies. These are "tendencies" or extremes of a type not the full picture of me just the inbalances I occasionally suffer. Laid open for your witness.

Now I know why I have always liked the brown over the pink! And a new word CHOREA! And although I don't have arthritis or paralysis it is amazing to know that many of my complaints are shared with others with similar constitution- I am not dying, I am just caustic.um.

No wonder our adoption agency has a difficult time with me.

Holy Day Doshi.
Ethiopia rebelled against the catholic church, (when requested to change the Sabbath from Saturday to Sunday) and moved to a 49 hour Sabbath to include the eve of Friday to Sunday night. Sanbate was named for the sabbath or holy days of the weekend.

Her name will mean when translated,

Daughter of the sun/born during the Holy Days/ Defies the tyrant.
Elianshu Sanbate Doshi

BAD PARENTS!

When the director of the Ethiopia program from our placement agency found out we were moving to India for three years she told us,

"One thing also to consider is that it's very hard to have major transitions while you are in the adoption process. I know you moved from MA to CA in the process - Moving to India would be another stressful challenge for your family. That may not be an optimal way to begin parenting.

I hope this is helpful."

Actually, it's not.

We have decided, despite assurances that we can obtain a passport for Sanbate within 6 months, to travel to Ethiopia in February to secure the IR3 visa. Whether or not we actually go depends on the ok from Dr. Tsegaye the director of the orphanage. He will be able to check and see if we will make it in time to travel BEFORE the baby's court date. But from the estimates (6-12 weeks from referral) we should have plenty of time.





We have been
"down sizing"
since we moved from New Hampshire to Massacusetts to California. But this is the big daddy in the story of our stuff. We just hope we can continue to keep it simple once we move.

To IR-3 or not to IR-3?
That is the question.
Whether it is nobler to
suffer the slings and arrows
Of Immigration slogging or the
two flights to Ethiopia.

We are in a state. It may behoove us to fly to Ethiopia soon before Sanbate's court date and secure an IR-3 visa so that she will be granted citizenship upon arrival.To do this you need to create proof that both parents have met the child before they petition to adopt the child.

"In simplistic terms, children entering the U.S. on an IR-3 visa are automatically granted U.S. citizenship upon immigration. Those entering on an IR-4 visa are NOT automatically granted U.S. citizenship without finalization of the foreign adoption under U.S. state law."

AS things stand she will be returning home on an IR-4 visa which means we need to finalize the adoption which can take up to 1 year! But flying out now means coming back and flying out again. The flight takes about 20 something hours. Not counting lay overs.

Moving to India will be a problem if little girl does not have a US Passport.

So we are trying to work out the logistics with Mr.D just new on the job. Chances are we thinks he will be required to fly out to India soon anyway and what is a little hop over to Ethiopia? Addis to Mumbai is only 4 hours.And unlike US airlines, it is relatively easy to buy a flight in India at the airport for an Indian destination.

We finally made it to Stinson beach, a sleepy little beach town on the coast of Muir Woods.

I know I have said this before but in time this whole adoption process will be a good deal easier, cheaper and more efficient.

According to my research and info. our agency has shared with us we will have to "re-adopt" our child when she comes home. When she arrives in the US she will be a legal resident but not a citizen. That is, unless the Ethiopian gov. issues her a IR-3 Visa which grants automatic citizenship to her 4 weeks after she arrives. Unfortunately, I believe she will be getting a IR-4 Visa which means we need to do an official re-adopt, apply for state issued birth certificate, apply for naturalization and citizenship and only then will she be a US citizen.













BREAKING NEWS

Mr. D has accepted a job from a large multi-national corporation and will be relocating our family to Bangalore, India.Here is the supposed best of Bangalore but we haven't arrived yet so the best is yet to come.
We move in July. That is, if all of the above is finalized between March and July. In the meantime, Mr.D will be working here and there, flying to and fro and in general "Taking Care of Business".
WE have a safety net. The Hatches. Who live here and have offered their home to me and Sanbate if we get held up by the powers that be. So.

This adventure continues.

Martin Luther King


We baked a cake,
We blew it out
Happy Birthday Martin Luther King, we shout
"I had a dream." he said,
People hand in hand,
Working and singing throughout the land.

My mentor and boss from the day care days in Chicago just sent this to me. It was the song her daughter and I wrote when she was 4. The tune is the same from the old spiritual that goes like this:

"Went to the river.
Couldn't get across.
Got in trouble with my boss.
Hy-yo, Hy-yo, Hy-yo-o-Hy-o.

Gimme a nickle,
gimme a dime,
see my honey baby all the time.
Hy-yo, Hy-yo, Hy-yo-o-Hy-o."

Here is what is happening in Oakland for Martin Luther King Jr. day:
click on Oakland Celebrates.

From the Boston Globe:

"Mayor Thomas M. Menino, with Martin Luther King III at his side, announced this morning that the city will build a statue commemorating King's parents, the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. and Coretta Scott King."

Here is a kitty movie I found on my Chicago/Mysore friend's blog which was actually made by among others an old co-worker of mine at The Chicago Diner. It is cool man and brought to you by Alliance for Human Action.

This morning I made myself a cup of coffee and toasted a bagel (which I rarely eat nowadays) and the smell of the everything bagel started me on a long reverie about Virginia's coffee shop in Logan Square in Chicago. My sister and I worked there and Virginia always bought the best bagels. One regular to the coffee shop was a house painter and rottweiller owner named Luke. A beautiful guy who drove a toyota land cruiser and became a close friend for a while until he moved to Alaska and I lost touch with him. He left me a gorgeous antique wing chair and the cool retro mug I was using for my coffee. My reverie was interrupted by the unmistakeable sound of a cat about to vomit. That moaning, unearthly sound. Quickly I scooped Sissy-the-pisser up, hoping to get her to mess into the sink. On the way to the sink my coffee mug, still in hand, hit the granite counter and shattered, coffee everywhere. We made it to the sink but there it was. My broken cup. My Luke reminder. and coffee everywhere.

There is a saying, "Let sleeping dogs lie".
I will add, "Let gagging cats puke".


Yesterday, I was on the phone trying to get vaccinated for yellow fever, which is required for travel in Ethiopia.

The Travel Doctor in Oakland has recently posted a note about yellow fever vaccinations:

"As of November 27,2007 , there is nationwide shortage of
yellow fever vaccine in single dose vials.
We only have the multidose vial available and we have to have 5 people who need yellow fever vaccine in the office at one time
If you need or think you need yellow fever vaccine please let us know before you make an appointment so that we can group people together. If we do not have 5 people there will be a surcharge per person based on the number of people who show up."

And they have yet to call me back about scheduling a "group shot session".
None of the other clinics that I called have called me back either.

Mr. D is in Banglore, India on business. It is very quiet here. Especially after our family in Ohio just left. No screaming girl, no torturing boy, No bellowing father, no wheedling mother. How I Miss Them So!

So I finished the photo album we are supposed to send to Sanbate. She is a little young to be understanding the pictures but... Maybe it helps the caregivers to transition the children.

The letter to the birth family will be more difficult as Sanbate's birth mom is still alive. I wonder if we will get to meet her. I hope we will. And perhaps she will allow me to take her picture. It will be so important later.


Bye Spartikus.
You held my attention
with your focused antics
and your regal cat acts.
You left us.
Now miss sister has no orange hunk
abiding therein.

Yeah I know I was ranting about stuff yesterday but I HAVE to talk about stuff today because I went out to buy some for Sanbate for her trip home. Now I know she is underweight but she is not under height so she is going to need clothing her size 12-18 months. Jayshree gave me some of Sujaya's clothing and I am so thankful as it is perfect and also mostly the right size. But don't get on my case for going into Berkeley and buying an outfit for Sanbate.

There is also more stuff we need to bring; bottles, diapers, blankees etc. which will be so exciting to pack.

When we "get the call" that says she is ready to come home we need to do several things:

Buy flights
Apply for Ethiopian Visas
Make appointment at pediatrician for 24 hours after we arrive home
Notarize any necessary documents
Finish Dear Birth Family letter
Buy donation items
Make reservations at hotel if needed
Finish travel document package
Buy last minute medication and diapers etc. for Sanbate
Traveler's checks

It isn't so much is it?

I went back to The Story of Stuff today and read more information about how the corporations are selling us this bag of *#@. I have decided to add Annie Leonard's blog onto my link site.

I am sick of this stuff.

Here is an interesting article published in Harper's by Mark Schapiro about the toxic chemicals in our stuff.

I recently got back in touch with a friend and employer who adopted a baby from
Brazil (who is now a full grown woman!!!)and she has recommended some important resources:

The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier (also visit her website)
Coming Home to Self by Nancy Verrier
Real parents, Real Children by Holly Von Gulden
Are These Kids Your's? which is about raising a child of a different race
Marcy Axness (adopting.org)

These are the books I have read so far:
The N word ( A great book for its expansive look at racism)
Transracial Adoptees Tell their stories (Very personal and very diverse)
Inside Transracial Adoption (I haven't finished it yet)
Black Baby White Hands ( A wonderful biography with perfect anecdotes of how a loving and educated family can make some BIG mistakes)

All the CUTES have been delivered and presented to their new friends;
Black and White Kitties, Terry, Twin Bunnies, Flower Fairy, Bear and shy Lizard, Bad Guy and his buddy "Sideways".


There were also a wild assortment of aprons I made for my lovely sisters, beautiful moms, neices and gracious sister-in-laws.

This is Mother Nature, not a war zone.